Catholic Online Forum

I have never believed in divorce but I am very worried about someone who has two children to care for and whose husband has been discovered to have a gambling problem. When they married he was bankrupt and the reason given was that his ex had the gambling problem. This woman is not a strong personality and finds it very difficult to confront him. They have been living separately for 3 years.

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Kathleen

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“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

Obviously, and obligatorily, I must suggest you consult a good orthodox Catholic priest on the matter, but...

If he has a verifiable and objectively diagnosed addiction to gambling, it seems to me that a civil divorce may be wise order to protect her finances from his addiction, regardless of the sacramental status of the marriage now or in the future. If there is reason to believe that he had a gambling addiction before the marriage, and further concealed it from her, then there are probably grounds for annulment.

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Jeff Stevens

Thanks Jeff. I suspect that is the case.

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Kathleen

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“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

Jeff,



I'd be interested to see a canonical basis for that.

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James Daly

"It is the Lord." (Jn 21:7)

Kathleen,

If they have been formally separated for as long as three years, I wonder why the sudden need for a divorce?

But as Jeff says, it needs to be discussed with a priest.

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James Daly

"It is the Lord." (Jn 21:7)

James,

In many US states, a bad credit report will also affect the spouse. It may be that in order to obtain things like housing, insurance, educational funds, etc, the non-gambling spouse needs a divorce to properly separate the credit reports.

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Rose West
"May God help us not to spoil His work" (Bl. Mother Theresa)

Rose,

I believe Kathleen is not an American.

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James Daly

"It is the Lord." (Jn 21:7)

JMJ


I believe Jeff is referring to this:



But as he wisely noted, all this is hypothetical. The faithful in such situations should resort to their pastor and their diocese to examine the facts and see what canon, if any applies.

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FabrizioParty like it's 1773!

The safest place for me to be is in the center of God's will, and if that is in the line of fire, that's where I'll be-Fr. T. Vakoc

Fabrizio,

Thanks.

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James Daly

"It is the Lord." (Jn 21:7)

I didn't think to mention the person is Australian.

Thanks, if she decides that is the road she is going to go down, I'll suggest she see the parish Priest.

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Kathleen

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“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

What are the laws on things like community property in Australia?

Is it possible that this guy ran up a lot of debt, got married specifically because her credit would improve his own, and then ran up more debt?

It's possible to do that in the US. The only way here for the wife to help herself is to get a divorce and then work to repair her own credit, which will not happen immediately.

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Rose West
"May God help us not to spoil His work" (Bl. Mother Theresa)

Rose, I don't actually know what the laws are regarding this.

I know that she had quite a few thousand dollars that she had saved over the years and within the first year of their marriage it disappeared. He didn't work for quite a while, he was sick at one stage, but when he returned to work was around the time they separated. While they were separated he didn't want to pay towards any of his daughters upkeep, schooling etc.

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Kathleen

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“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

Rose,



No, it's not. Her credit rating is hers, his is his. (Unless they took out a joint loan in which case they are each and severally liable.)

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James Daly

"It is the Lord." (Jn 21:7)

That's not how it works in the US. Depending upon how a state handles community property, one person's debt, even prior to marriage, can impact the other's credit after marriage.

So I can easily see how a situation like gambling can really have a bad effect upon the kids, and civil divorce would be the other parent's best option to protect them.

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Rose West
"May God help us not to spoil His work" (Bl. Mother Theresa)